Preview Round 2: Collingwood v Sydney Swans

Big Footy - Leg End

Collingwood v Swans Saturday March 29, 7.40pm ANZ Fox Footy / 7mate 7.30pm Weather: Min 20 Max 27 Chance of rain 60%: 1-5mm Wind: SE 22kph Betting: Collingwood $2.80 Swans $1.44

Both teams were unquestionably disappointed with their first round losses. The Swans kicked 1-6 at a crucial stage allowing the Giants to stay in the game. The Pies were massacred by an impressive Freo who look more and more likely to join Sydney in this year’s grand final.

History between the Clubs
A nice simmering rivalry has developed between the clubs based on numerous factors:

• Collingwood held the wood over Sydney for many years making these clashes something to savour.
• Eddie Maguire’s big mouth added fuel to the fire in the racist brouhaha involving Adam Goodes last year.
• Eddie Everywhere has also been a key driver in the AFL removing Sydney’s cost of living allowance on the justification that only Collingwood should benefit from any largesse bestowed by the AFL.
• Distaste remains for Joffa, the Liberace-impersonating caveman, whose famous gold jacket was constructed from the gold fillings of supporters bashed by Pies fans in the previous decade.

Jesse White has also left Sydney to join the Pies – adding a little more spice to the game. The original contract negotiations hit a rough spot because Jesse was found to have less tattoos than most female Pies fans – but luckily for all this issue was resolved as Jesse promised to pull three front teeth out before the season started.

The Game
Collingwood has won most games between the clubs in the last 5 years. ANZ stadium holds no fears for the Pies who hold a 75% winning ratio there against the Swans. Kieran Jack is expected to return but Kurt Tippett will have to wait another week. Nick Smith and Josh Kennedy celebrate 100 games.
The game revolves around who will respond to a poor first round. From a quality perspective, the Swans have the team on paper (hard midfield, speed with Jetta, Rohan, quality in Buddy, solid defence). However, on what will be a soggy pitch on Saturday, it is wet skills and strategy that will determine the outcome. Will short kicks to short, sharp leads prevail or will the “bomb long and haggle in the slop” be the best approach?

Umpires
At posting time, umpires had not been nominated, so there has been no opportunity to assess their background and character. However, it really makes no difference. I am expecting two Victorians with a deepseated dislike for the AFL’s “pet’ Swans and enormous respect for Eddie Maguire and his devotion to making Collingwood the only team in the AFL. We can expect a constant stream of questionable free kicks to the Pies and for the Swans to receive their obligatory one free every 24 minutes on the boundary line 80 metres out. There will be the usual distractions for the umpires - the high whistling sounds from Collingwood fans breathing heavily through limited teeth – the constant screams of “that should be a free” from Dwayne Russell in the commentary box. It will be a tough night to conceal corruption – but where better than NSW? 

Prediction
I am never enamoured with the Swans in the wet - they’re more a dry track proposition in my book. However, I think we will see them bounce back with a stirring victory over the Pies in terrible conditions. Kennedy and Jack will smash Collingwood in the middle, Teddy and the boys will block supply at the back and Buddy will wheel around all day kicking bombs from 60.
I predict the Swans by 42 – net umpiring fraud – Swans by 22.